the darkest moments and the brightest sunshine

This is what the Lord says: "When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek Me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from the place which I carried you into exile."

Jeremiah 29:10-14

Plans. The very word sends my mind into a semi-frantic worry about the future. About where my life is going and whether I'm going to like where I end up. What college should I transfer to? And what should I major in? What about next summer? What if ______ happens? So much has changed in the last year, how am I even to plan for the year to come?

And then there's the realization that no matter what happens, God's will will prevail.

Which should bring peace... but this dreamer heart of mine all too often wants to fight for "my way". Completely forgetting what "my way" has caused before or simply choosing not to care. Like Adam and Eve in the garden, I far too often decide I want what I cannot have. And that just makes everything harder.

Why must I cling so desperately to what I want, thinking that it's best, when deep down inside I know that my spirit is crying out for Him?

"For I know the plans I have for you... plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

"For I know..."

And slowly... slowly but surely... like so many times before, all my plans being to fade at His feet. Fade at the realization that all He wants for me is good. Every thing He lets happen to His beloved happen for a reason.

When the Israelites received this prophecy, they were in the middle of a seventy year exile in Babylon. Talk about a dark time. Why in the world would God send His people out of their land?

In Jeremiah 25:3-5, Jeremiah says: "For twenty-three years - from the thirteenth year of Josiah son of Amon until this very day - the word of the Lord has came to me and I have spoken to you again and again, but you have not listened. And though the Lord has sent all his servants the prophets to you again and again, you have not listened or paid any attention. They said, 'Turn now, each of you, from your evil ways and your evil practices, and you can stay in the land the Lord gave to you and your fathers for ever and ever."

It is later in this chapter that God declares the 70 year banishment for His people. To me, it is now much more clear why He sent His people out of the land: they stubbornly and repeatedly disobeyed Him.

And like a little kid who wants to know how everything works and exactly why things are the way they are, I ask for the thousandth time today: "Why? Why not have mercy on them again and let them stay?"

And God, being the good parent He is, has an answer.

He loved them.

He was disciplining those He loved. (Hebrews 12:5 to 6)

But how could such a terrible punishment be completed in love?

Verses 12-13 of chapter twenty-nine say: "Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."

Another piece of the puzzle. After the declaration of the exile, after the promise that it is for their good, comes the why; so that, after all they go through, after 70 years of being foreigners, they may finally seek the Lord.

After 70 years of being away from home, He knew that they would finally return to Him. He knew that this would be best for them. Would glorify Him. And then they would be ready to enjoy the land He had promised to them all along. And when ready, He would gather them home. (v. 14)

There's so many kinds of storms in this life. Some brought about by sin, and some just seem to come out of no where. Both can leave us wondering "Why?"

But day by day, God is teaching me to let go of what I see, to let go of the bitterness and the hurt, and to trust in His love. Just like He loved and planned good things for the Isrealites, so He has good things for us.

I'll humbly admit I struggle with deep-rooted doubt. But what if we, together, started to trust Him more bit by bit, day by day? Let's believe :)

P.S.: I couldn't quite fit these verses in! But they've been on my heart while typing so... here they are! :D
The Lord foils the plans of the nations, he thwarts the purposes of the peoples, but the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of His heart through all generations. (Psalm 33:10-11, and )

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28)

Every good and perfect gift comes from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like the drifting shadows. (James 1:17)

P.P.S.: This song is AMAZING. It was a burst of sunshine in the middle of a dark time this afternoon. I stumbled upon it on Vicki Courtney's blog (which is also amazing) and thought it fit in pretty well here. Hope you enjoy!

freedom

"Then he showed me the high priest Joshua standing before the angel of the LORD, and Satan standing at his right side to accuse him. The LORD said to Satan, 'The LORD rebuke you Satan! The LORD, who has chosen Jerusalem, rebuke you! Is not this man a burning stick snatched from the fire?'

Now Joshua was dressed in filthy clothes as he stood before the angel. The angel said to those who were standing before him 'Take off his filthy clothes.'

Then he said to Joshua, 'See I have taken away your sin, and I will put rich garments on you.'

Then I said, 'Put a clean turban on his head.' So they put a clean turban on his head and clothed him, while the Angel of the LORD stood by."
Zechariah 3:1-5

Covered in filthy garments, facing Satan's accusations. I've got a feeling Joshua must have been feeling hopelessly beaten down in this moment.

But with swiftness and power the Lord silences the accusations, declares Joshua chosen and rescued, commands his dirty clothes taken away and promises to clothe him in rich garments.

Suddenly, everything is changed. The stains are gone! What a relief.

A new promise is given:

"The angel of the LORD gave this charge to Joshua "This is what the LORD Almighy says: If you will walk in My ways and keep my requirements, then you will govern my house and have charge of my courts, and I will give you a place among these standing here."

Zechariah 3:6

A promise of reward and blessing, a place of high standing and the role of governing His courts. If Joshua walked in His ways.

I've got the tendency to think something along of lines of "Oh. Walking in the Lord's ways. I, I'm pretty sure I can't do that. Or govern His house or courts. I've failed so many times before, who says I'll make it this time? It'd probably just be easier to give up."

But His grace always tells a different story. "Who says?" becomes "God says."

"'Listen, O high priest Joshua and your associates seated before you, who are men symbolic of things to come: I am going to bring you My Servant, the Branch. See, the stone I have set in front of Joshua! There are seven eyes on that stone, and I will engrave an inscription on it,' says the LORD Almighty, 'and I will remove the sin of this land in a single day. In that day each of you will invite his neighbor to sit under his vine and his fig tree.' declares the LORD Almighty."

Again the LORD promises to take away the sins of the land. To bring them peace. And promises "His Servant, the Branch."

2 Cor. 5:7 tells us that if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. In Acts the believers were given His Holy Spirit, a helper. Zechariah 4:6 reminds us that the works of the Lord will be completed "Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit." This passage may have been talking about Joshua or symbolically about Jerusalem, but in Christ we too are clean. Freed by the power in His great Name. Washed by His blood. Given a second chance...

...not only a new chance, but the strength to make this one count. The assurance that it wouldn't be better to "just give up." The strength to overcome every past failure. After all, those "dirty garments" of past mistakes and weaknesses have been taken away. With this heavy burden lifted we are free to serve the Lord with all our heart.

...a chance that we don't have to chase our tails or worry about blowing. Because in God's grace we fall less. We get up faster. We walk steadier. Day by day more faithful, rebuilt and FREE. The stress is gone, and only love remains. We are free to serve God not out of guilt or in failed attempts to earn salvation, but out of pure thankfulness for all that He has done for us.

I don't know about you, but all too often I am beat to near death by accusations and failures, whether true or false. I often feel just as Joshua must have as he was being accused by Satan. Always worrying about how my actions or words affected someone, the state of my own heart, if I'll be strong enough to love my coworkers or if I'll ever be able to love our Savior enough.

I'm learning more and more that He is my victory, He is enough, and in Him I am new.

Don't be bound anymore by the chains of worry.

in Christ, we are free indeed. <3>

always love

Hey guys! So I've been a bit missing in action lately, I haven't written a post in weeks! God has recently blessed me with an amazing new job at a bakery and school just let out. Hopefully now I can fall into a little bit more of a routine and keep this more up to date :)

Anyway, I just wanted to share something that was on my heart tonight.

love.

There's so many different definitions of love out there, everyone seems to have their own little spins or ways that they think love should be. Love is getting lost in someone's eyes. Love is those butterflies in your stomach when you see them around. Love is ...

I grew up and to this day still am a romantic dreamer. I will pick the romance out of a movie and immediately follow only those two characters for the rest of the plot. I can still (with much embarrassment) tell you the name of every boy I had a crush on or thought I was in love with at some point in time. Some might call me a hopeless romantic.

So I've probably read 1 Corinthians 13 like... a thousand a million times.

And I'm pretty sure every time I read it God shows me something new.

Today I got in a fight with one of my best friends. Fighting is the exact opposite of love. It's no fun, and I always regret it.

So I read 1 Corithians 13... again. (make that a million and one times ;)

And this jumped out at me:
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient... It does not insist on its own way... Love never fails."

I only picked a few of those out, but honestly looking bad at the passage it hit me all over again: love is the opposite of selfishness.

No matter what you do, it means nothing without love.

Had I been thinking of my friends well being, I would have loved. I would have spoken in such a way that was full of grace and caring, and most of all humility.

I finish this post today challenging myself to remember what love really means. :))

"There is no greater love than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."

Selflessly.

the King is glorious

"All you have made will praise You, O LORD; Your saints will extol You." Psalm 150:1

If the voiceless skies can praise Him, how much more could I?

2 Corinthians 1:3-7

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all or troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share our sufferings you also share in our comfort.

Praising God for His comfort, peace, strength, salvation, patience & joy today. He is near :)